Diary of a Noble Self Employed Naija Dame (16)

Please follow and like us:

  • 0
  • Share

TGIS, thank God it’s Sunday, this is a new coined phrase, and every fibre in my body had been looking forward to Sunday. Let’s face it, if you do not attend parties frequently, church on Sunday is ‘the place’; it offers the same benefit of letting go.
I do not always attend Sunday school, but I did today for some reason, the topic was Vanity upon Vanity, I was thanking God that vanity had never been and will never be my portion. Anyway church was so sweet, not that I can remember what the sermon was all about but praise and worship entered another realm. ‘O selenke’.
When the praise and worship started I was still posing, all of sudden they started the song ‘Oyibiribiri kan me O’ ( my turn for the Grace of God) I totally forgot where I was , I began to twerk, after a while I let loose of all decorum, the twerking became sensual. To tell you the truth you cannot conceal smoke, it always finds an escape point.  The pious members of the church must have called me names. Let me call myself one before they do, I was Jezebel. Let’s face it, a Jezebel spirit lurks in each and every one of us, it releases itself when provoked, the drummer provoked mine. I beg, let’s leave that side for now.
I need to explain what happened next, I was not the only one feeling good, when the thirty minutes of praise and worship was about to finish, the congregation shouted for more, I was not sure whether I was at a concert or in church. We danced for one hour. Afterwards the pastor asked us to come to the altar so that he could bless us. He asked us to close our eyes.
It was at that moment, that I remembered my LV bag and my iphone. As I opened one eye, to see if all was well. I saw two young guys, looking at the direction of my bag and I knew they were together. ‘Lord have mercy’. It was at that same moment we were asked to kneel down. I knelt down but it was my back that I had to the altar o, with both eyes now open, i began to scan the environment.
As one of the guys was about to move, I quickly got up, dashed straight for my bag, unfortunately, I did not have the opportunity to go back to the altar but I know in my heart of hearts, that God understands, it would have been foolishness to have continued with the prayer at the expense of my bag being nicked.
Then it was time for offering, I thought that there was a correlation between ‘Praise and Worship’ and our offering, it was not the case in our church. As the offering basket was being passed round, with all that dancing and noise, I was of the impression people would be moved to give. You won’t believe this, all the people on my row passed the basket on without dropping anything. Had they come to church or come to a concert. I went home thinking mmm ‘Church’ or ‘Concert’?

Source: The Nation
Facebook Comments

Please follow and like us:

  • 0
  • Share

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *