Dear Bunmi,

My husband and I have been together for 10 years, married for six years. We have two lovely sons of seven years and six months.

Before I got pregnant with my second child, I’d started text-flirting with one of my husband’s friends. When I got pregnant, it stopped, but now I have started again.

I love my husband very much, but we do have some issues. I wonder if this is the reason I have become attracted to his friend.

This is not the first time I have had a relationship with someone else, but it has never been anything physical. It’s almost as though I just need someone to pay me attention.

My husband has a lot of hobbies and rarely spends time alone with me. Could it be that which is causing me to become attracted to other men? I don’t want to cheat on him, but I feel like I’m behaving the way I do in case it satisfies whatever it is I’m looking for.

Please help as I don’t know what to do.

Fadeke, by e-mail.

Dear Fadeke,

You really need to talk to your husband and let him know you are feeling neglected. Ask him if it’s possible for him to take a little time out of his day to remind you how much he cares for you.

If you keep this texting going, then it’s very likely to lead to something else. That something else might sound good right now, but you need to think about your children and how your decisions will affect their lives in the long run.

It may not be easy with two young children to look after, but maybe you could get some hobbies as well — ideally, the same one as your husband’s. If you’re busy, you may not feel neglected.